all good things are wild and free.

Keep breathing Ehr.

A year ago today we lost lost an amazon human, we lost a friend. You were incredible and kind and would do anything for the people in your life. You would light up the room, you could cheer anyone up. That smile. You fought a battle and showed everyone how strong you were. Never will I forget the impact you had on my life, even now after you’re gone. You’re still here. I wish I could have known you better while I had the chance, it’s a shame that Ididn’t. But now we can all look back and be thankful you were here at all. And be thankful about everything we have and stop taking things and especially people for granted. Having a rough day? It could be worse. Chances are you’ll be waking up in the morning with a sense of normalcy and all of your friends and family right where you left them the night before. Its’s so simple but so powerful. Alex, you remind us everyday to smile and to laugh and to be better people. To forgive. For that, I thank you. I know you’re having the time of your life and watching down on us too. Always the utmost love. always love.

with your feet in the air and your head on the ground.

I should be writing a paper but “where is my mind” by the pixies on repeat is distracting me and dragging my mind elsewhere. Funny, no one reads this. And I am more than okay with that. But here’s the thing, I’m having a few moral dilemmas at the moment. I feel as though if there is a conclusion to these problems I’m having, getting them all out in words will somehow give the changes a kick start. No complaints at all currently, actually things are better than wonderful. Tomorrow my incredible mother is coming to campus to pick me up and take me shopping. I am planning on buying an $88 pair of lululemon leggings and hopefully make it to a few other stores to find a pair of jean shorts for my upcoming trip to florida with my track team. I have four pairs of lululemon leggings and even more than four pairs of jean shorts, but for some reason I feel the need to buy more. Always more. Why do I need more? I don’t. Not at all, not in the least. I have everything I could ever need right here in front of me, most of which has been handed to me on silver platter. Running comes effortlessly, I love it and love the people who do it with me. And yet, I am getting paid to run here at school. PAID to do what I love for four entire years. I am getting a trip to florida with these wonderful humans. I travel across the country and get to compete with some of the greatest athletes america has ever seen, sometimes even the world. My family is incredible. My mom who would do anything to see me smile, my best friend. My dad, dave, the man. Essentially my biggest fan (next to his own father). My dad can literally fix anything. My brother. Alex. Such a marvelous soul, of course every sibling pair has their differences but he makes me a better person just by being himself. He is an inspiration in quiet, yet extremely powerful, ways. His angel of a girlfriend and their new life together. Winnie. For the most part, health has been something I have selfishly taken for granted. We are a lucky family. Blessed with the most amazing grandparents and aunts and uncles you could ever imagine. So many people aren’t so fortunate, and yet I still want more. I plan on ordering clothes from brandy melville in the next few days… On orders over $100, shipping is free. So why would I not just spend the $100? Or really, why would I? What will it do? put a few more cheaply made pieces of sewn together cloth into my closet? good. exactly what i need. So I suppose this really is not going anywhere now that it has been put down, and thats ok too. Just know I am thankful. So insanely thankful for my family, my friends, and my education and everything that goes along with it. For track and field and the opportunities it has given me. For trees, and their ability to keep me wondering and occupied for hours. For the fact that my family is able to provide me with indulgences that I by NO means need, but rather just selfishly want. For my life. It’ll all come full circle, whatever IT really is. Where is my mind?

Until more deep thoughts are upon me,

kathleen. 

and that’s that.

Aside from birds, few things bother me more than rudeness and ignorance in human-to-human interaction. How difficult is it to appreciate someone and the hard work they put into their own masterpieces? A simple “thank you” can turn someone’s day around, and make them feel like what they have to offer is meaningful and has been properly acknowledged. It is an easy task to make a good first impression. A firm handshake, genuine smile, and just the right amount of eye contact is all there is to it. After the good first impression has been established, keeping it up isn’t rocket science, either. Kindness is key. I am well aware that I am no saint by any means. We all have said things we regret, hid from them, and finally decided to swallow our pride and do one of the hardest things known to man, apologize. But it is necessary to keep in mind that it is much more difficult rebuilding the bridges we have burned after their imaginary ashes have blown away. Why burn that bridge in the first place? Why not smile and say hello while in passing as opposed to putting your head down and giving the cold shoulder? You never know what someone has to offer. The most successful relationships are not necessarily the ones that are cliché and expected. Open the doors that intrigue you. No matter what, you will gain something. Each person that comes into your life can teach you something that you didn’t know before. Finding other humans who understand what is going on in that insane mind of yours is not something to take for granted, it is something to cherish and appreciate. Wasting time on people and problems that drag you to the depths with them are useless. People may come and go like seasons, and I firmly believe it is meant to be that way. Maybe some people truly are meant to stick around while others leave and it is for the best. Open your eyes and stop taking this beautiful life for granted, along with the people who help shape it. Enough with the ignorance, being selfish is appropriate in plenty of other situations. Give him the second chance he so well deserves; patiently listen to her while she complains about something that means absolutely nothing to you but everything to her. And never regret those decisions. Hold onto the people who make you happy, and always keep a kind and wide open mind to new experiences that will surely come your way.

Drink a mimosa. Look at old pictures. Listen to anything My Morning Jacket. Go thrifting. Make your mom laugh until she cries. Blow out a speaker (or don’t, that frog-like noise haunts you forever). Watch game of thrones. Find a chinchilla or guinea pig and go nuts with the precious little nugget. Run outside on a january afternoon in Wisconsin. Start a conversation with a stranger, you WILL learn something. Hug the ones you love, let the ones who are too far let them know that you would hug them if you can. Whatever it is, just do it. smile. be. love. work hard. appreciate. never take for granted. Simple as that.